Monday, April 9, 2012

Dancing With the Stars Recap: Rock and/or Roll

Tonight on "Dancing With the D-list," it was Rock Week, otherwise known as the week that Jimi Hendrix rolls in his grave when a football player dances the Paso Doble shirtless to one of his songs.

Jimi Hendrix' rolling aside, it was an exciting night, especially because we totally didn't mis-hear last week. KISS is there tonight! That is awesome. Kel also loved the troupe dancing, with the boys are in sparkly tight bodysuits. That does not leave much the imagination.

On to the dances ...

Val & Sherri Shepherd, Tango to "C'mon Feel the Noise" by Quiet Riot.
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: See! See! Ballroom instructors are hands on and place/push their partner into place. So can we now not spazz out when Maks does it. Kay? Also, Val really is hot. He should always dance shirtless.
Dance: Though Val in only a leather vest is hot, too. Sherri also looks hot. I want that outfit. Sherri's technique is not great. She needs to arch back way more. One of the easiest things to do right in tango when technique isn't your strong point is the form. She looks a bit ploddy. However, the intensity in her face was great. And can I say, I got very distracted by her boots, his lack of shirt, her cleavage, his ass, etc.
Jen's Thoughts: First of all, let's just put it out there. Val's chest. Yum. OK, anyway. Sherri has been riding on her bubbly personality so far, but this week she amped up the sex appeal. I loved her outfit, her intensity and her hip action. She also is improving at the actual dancing, which is a huge plus!
Judges' Thoughts: The judges liked her attitude, though Carrie Ann missed her exuberance. Overall, they thought she did well but needed to be a bit sharper with her steps.
Score: Three 7s, for a total of 21.

Mark & Katherine Jenkins, Paso Doble to "Time is Running Out" by Muse
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: She looks terrified to be tough. Luckily Mark takes her fighting! She is adorable. Not really what you are going for in Paso.
Dance: She seems to not be totally sure of her moves. She keeps fumbling her connections with Mark. She has the intensity in her face, but her dancing seems very surface level. Mark looked great in that dance, though.
Jen's Thoughts: I like it when she goes into the strong, fighty moves, but she does seem a little timid at times. It was really fun to see her go outside of her normal comfort zone, but her dance wasn't terribly memorable overall.
Judges' Thoughts: They agreed that the intensity was there, but it really threw off her footing. She was, in Bruno's words, a "whirlwind of fury" but it wasn't as clean as it should have been.
Score: Three 8s, for a total of 24.

Kym & Jaleel White, Tango to "Satisfaction" by the Rolling Stones
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Does he really not know who Mick Jagger is? I'm going to assume that he is joking. They are fun together in rehearsal. And I love how jazzed Kym is about it being rock week.
Dance: He had pretty decent footwork and Kym's choreography was good. But overall I felt no energy off of that tango. Maybe it was the band's fault? I'm not sure. It just did nothing for me. I think it may be that it was an awfully happy tango with no real intensity. Jaleel's death drop was fun, though.
Jen's Thoughts: I like his strut, but overall it's a weird feel for the tango. Part of it is just that he's trying to be too smooth. This sort of rock isn't really that smooth. I feel like there wasn't a lot of tension or heat in this tango, and that's what tango needs.
Judges' Thoughts: Carrie Ann loved it, because she is an idiot. Len and Bruno, however, thought that it was too smooth and didn't have enough drive.
Score: An 8 from Carrie Ann and 7s from Len & Bruno, for a total of 22.

Maks & Melissa Gilbert, Paso Double to "Conquest" by the White Stripes
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Maks's hair is a bouffant! Maks wants Melissa to get mad. I feel like working with Maks, it would be easy to channel anger into the dance. Please don't step on Maks's jewels.
Dance: So far, this is the most traditional paso, both in music and outfitting. Melissa really pulls off this look. And is really nailing her dance. She still has moments of awkwardness, but this dance really worked for her. There was intensity and passion and her swivels were sick. My favorite dance so far tonight. And by far her best dance. Not sure how Maks fell there. He really recovered it well.
Jen's Thoughts: I was glad that they did a paso that actually had that traditional matador-bull feel, since that's what the dance is about. I think that Melissa actually did channel some anger and passion into the dance, because it was her best dance so far. She still looked liked she's being put through her paces and, occasionally, hanging on for dear life, but part of it is that she looks a little slow next to the super precise Maks. Also, let's just say that Maks looks good in an open shirt!
Judges' Thoughts: They loved the flavor and confidence and generally agreed it was Melissa's best dance. However, they mentioned that there was a problem with the end of the dance (Maks apparently slipped), and that Melissa still looks like she can't keep up with Maks.
Score: Surprisingly, an 8 from Len and 7s from Carrie Ann and Bruno, for a total of 22.

Peta & Donald, Paso Double to "Purple Haze" by Jimi Hendrix
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Holy crap his arms are hot! And so is his chest. Donald in Peta's sweater is my favorite thing I've ever seen. That is amazing.
Dance: He needs a bit more snap in certain parts of the dance. However, he performed the shit out of that dance. And he looked ridiculously strong and hot and I sorta forgot to watch the technique. Peta did a great job showing off his strength. He really nailed it.
Jen's Take: Love the intensity! Love the strength! Love the shirtless football player! Seriously, though, it was a very intense, strong dance, which obviously works for big strong football players (duh, Brookbot). There was a lot of snap and intensity to most of his moves, and I just absolutely LOVED watching this dance!
Judges' Thoughts: Carrie Ann jizzed in her pants, I'm pretty sure. Also, apparently dropped acid before the dance, because she called it psychedelic. Bruno called it "muscular, masculine, magnificent!" And Len said it was his best dance so far.
Score: Three 9s for a total of 27.

Tristan & Gladys Knight, Tango to "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Gladys said she was going to be a "real slut". Gladys is in the rock n' roll hall of fame. She gives great sound bite. And you can tell that Tristan is totally in love with her.
Dance: I would critique Gladys, but I think that any dance problems were caused by the shit singers. Her outfit was hot and the choreography was amazing. Also, her hair is spiky and sparkly! Holy shit I love her so so much. Also, Tristan has chest hair and looks hot with eyeliner. I'm just going to keep loving on Gladys because I can, so there. 
Jen's Thoughts: First of all, the judges and Tom Bergeron's faces at the beginning like Queen? Genius. OK, anyway ... Gladys tries hard and has fun, but her feet were a hot mess. I thought they did a great job choreographing, and I thought she could feel the rock part of the song better, but it wasn't that great as far as a dance goes. Still, I am like Kel - I love Gladys anyway!
Judges' Thoughts: They liked her ambition and her coping skills, but they agreed her feet weren't great. Still, Bruno said she's a class act, and that's all you really need to know.
Score: A pair of 7s from the Spazzy Twins and a 6 from Len for a total of 20.

Cheryl & William Levy, Jive to "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Why do they get to do jive when everyone else had to do Tango and Paso!? I like the crazy heavy metal guys. They should be on the show!
Dance: He looks like such a dork doing jive! He has no turnout. And he is ploddy. And he messed up his cool trick. Which made him lose the performance. This dance went downhill fast. You can even see it in Cheryl's face. Apparently that is because her shoe fell off. But overall, William's dancing is lazy. 
Jen's Take: Blah. Even I can see that William is lazy with his feet. He just doesn't commit to the steps, He is getting by with his inexplicable popularity and generic hotness, and that's just not cool. He sucked it up tonight.
Judges' Take: At least the judges kind of called him out on it. Len, especially, sparking Kel to say, "I agree with Len's judging. You tell them, crabby old man." He said that there were timing issues and he didn't nail the dance. Bruno said he was getting complacent. Carrie Ann babbled for a while.
Score: A pair of 7s from Carrie Ann and Len, and an 8 from Bruno, for a total of 22. Kel says, "How did William get a higher score than Gladys? At least she knew her fucking steps!" Amen, sista!

Chelsie & Roshon Fegan, Viennese Waltz to "Time of My Life" by David Cook
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Roshon doesn't seem like he would be suited to Vienese Waltz, which really is the hardest of the dances to learn. They are adorable! His pants are tighter than hers, though.
Dance: Dancing to a David Cook song = awesome. Dancing to this David Cook song = not so awesome. Viennese Waltz is supposed to be smooth and he is a bit bouncy on his basic steps. However, it did have a lot of traditional steps, which I really like. Just because you are using nontraditional music, or especially when you do, it is nice to have traditional dancing. He really faked the dance well, but the technique was not super.  
Jen's Thoughts: He's so adorable! Look at him in his little suit! Awwww! I want to pinch his cheeks. Sorry, I'm OK now ... he's just so adorable! I thought he danced well and had a nice feel. It wasn't thrilling but it was a very sweet little dance.
Judges' Thoughts: Bruno said he had great extensions, and Carrie Ann thought it was like the climax of a Disney movie. Len even humored Roshon by saying, "Good job, dawg!" They all thought it was elegant despite a couple of stumbles.
Score: 9s from the twins and an 8 from cranky old man, for a total of 26.

Derek & Maria Menounos, Tango to "School's Out" by Alice Cooper
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: Maria, I understand pushing through the pain on your broken foot, but you have to take care of yourself! You don't want to have to quit. Take care, girl!
Dance: Maria almost has great posture. She needs to lean her shoulders back more, not just arch her back. However, she is rocking her choreography, which is once again excellent choreography by Derek. I'm not sure I believed her intensity. It seemed a bit too happy for such an intense dance. However, Derek looked hot with his mohawk! 
Jen's Thoughts: Maria has great moves! I know it's a bit happy, but Alice Cooper is kind of silly, so I think it works. I thought it was a good, well-choreographed dance that was executed well and a LOT of fun!
Judges' Thoughts: They liked the aggression and chemistry, but thought she lacked control a little bit. Still, they were pretty happy with it.
Score: Same as Roshon's for a total of 26.

Karina & Gavin DeGraw, Tango to "Paint it Black" by the Rolling Stones
Kel's Thoughts: Rehearsal: He really should do well with the rock n' roll attitude since he is a rock singer. I'm concerned about the sexiness of Gavin. She really may tape his mouth shut at some point. They are fun together.
Dance: Gavin's eyeliner is the star of this show. Whoa boy, put your shoulders down. He definitely still has some technique issues, but he knows his steps and works probably harder than anyone else. And he had some nice attitude in his dancing. Karina's tango choreography was really interesting. Also, I'm fairly certain he is in a velvet and sparkly vest. Automatic win! 
Jen's Thoughts: Gavin really worked to be snappy and aggressive, and it mostly worked for me. You can really tell he's working hard and concentrating, which is good except that sometimes it makes his face look a little closed off and nervous. He's a little messy but, dammit, I love Gavin DeGraw!
Judges' Thoughts: They liked it! They really liked it! At least, they liked the flair, attitude, determination, intention and character. However, they critiqued his hold, posture and the fact that he doesn't tuck his bum in while he dances.
Total: 8s from Carrie Ann and Len, and a 7 from Bruno for a total of 23.

Final Thoughts:
We both really like several people, and not always the best dancers! There were some good dances tonight, but some of it was sort of weird. If it were up to us, we'd send William home in a heartbeat, but that may not happen. And we're both worried about our sentimental favorites, Gladys and Gavin, going home this week.

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