Monday, March 19, 2012

Dancing With the Stars: The Saga Begins!

Welcome back to the land of mirror ball trophies, sequins and D-list celebrities! That's right ... "Dancing With the Stars" is back!

OK, we have to admit that Monday's premiere was a pretty dang good episode. There were several very good dancers, although the judges had a major case of score inflation. Now, listen, Carrie Ann, Bruno and Len: If you give people mostly 7s and 8s with a few 6s and 9s on the VERY FIRST NIGHT, you don't give them anywhere to go. Let's give them some lower scores the first week and let them work up to it.

Anyway, there are a lot of d-list celebrities to mock critique. Let's get to it:

  • Maria Menounus & Derek Hough - ChaCha
    Kel's Take: Thoughts from their rehearsal...I love her and her laugh. I want her on my tv every week! Also, Derek only has four chest hairs. Their dance...for a first effort, she has decent footwork though she needs to tighten up her steps. However, she definitely looked like she was having lots of fun and you can already see the connection between Maria and Derek. Is she married? Because if not, cue the romance rumors!
    Jen's Take: She does well on remembering her steps, and she definitely looks happy to be there, but she's very restrained with her steps and her arm movements. She needs to loosen up.
    Judges' Take: All three judges thought she needed to work on her hip action, and Carrie Ann said that she also needs to work on fluidity of her movement.
    Score: Sevens all around, for a total of 21.
  • Jack (Not Robert) Wagner & Anna Trebunskaya - Foxtrot
    Kel's Take: Rehearsal...Jack is a little whiny, but Anna is awesome and badass and I love her! Their Dance...was fine. Jack, not Robert, performs well because he is an actor, but I was not overly impressed with his footwork. He looked very flatfooted in parts. Also, that was super duper easy choreography. And Len totally agreed with my judging. I hate when Len is the judge who makes sense.
    Jen's Take: It was a very dorky, corny dance, which sort of worked for the foxtrot. It was cute but not terribly well-executed. His feet were definitely a mess, and there was no excuse because it was an easy dance. Overall, Not Robert was just "meh."
    Judges' Take: Carrie Ann loved it, as usual, but Len, while he liked the lightness Not Robert brought, he was not impressed with his footwork.
    Score: 8s from Carrie Ann and Bruno and a 7 from Len, for a total of 23.
  • Donald Driver & Peta Murgatroyd - ChaCha
    Kel's Take: Rehearsal...Donald seems to really want to win, which is awesome. Enthusiasm goes a long way in the ballroom. He is rather hot, yet has bizarrely skinny legs. Dance...I am going to ignore any technique problems because his enthusiasm overshadowed any problems he may have had. Also, I kept getting distracted by Peta because Damn, girl is hot. Also, he stuck out his tongue, which is one of my favorite things to do in Latin dance. I need them around for a long while.
    Jen's Take: Another football player whose name I'll learn! Donald was pretty light on his feet, especially for being a football dude. I also really liked his flashiness and winning smile, and I appreciated that he got into the hip action. Even if he had a few technique flaws, his performance wins out.
    Judges' Take: The judges thought he got overexcited but was hot on the dance floor.
    Score: 7s all around for a total of 21.
  • Gavin DeGraw & Karina Smirnoff - Foxtrot
    Kel's Take: he going to wear a hat the whole time? Also, I love him. He is funny, but I think Karina is going to be good for him. Dance...That is really great choreography from Karina. Gavin looked happy to be dancing, which is always nice to see. His foot technique looked ok, but his top half was a bit off and maybe a touch stiff. I'm not sure how long he will last on the show, but you can tell that he is going to enjoy every second of being on the show.
    Jen's Take: I liked the romantic feel to the dance. He over-exaggerated his movements a bit too much, but I can tell he was trying to be flowing. When he got into the meat of the dancing, though, he stiffened back up. He's cute, though, so I liked him!
    Judges' Take: They liked his musicality but said he was too stiff.
    Score: 7s from Carrie Ann and Bruno, and a 6 from Len, for a total of 20.
  • Roshon Fegan & Chelsie Hightower - Chacha
    Kel's Take: Rehearsal...he has the best name known to man. It is part hip hop dancer, part Dicken's character. He is kinda goofy and seems to be embracing the silly. Dance...Dancing The Wanted! Awesome! With those long legs he really needs to straighten his legs when he steps. He also needs to work on his turnout and did I see a heel step? However, he had high energy and did a perfect moonwalk!
    Jen's Take: That Disney Channel kid's got the moves! His biggest issue is going to be staying ballroom instead of going hip-hop. However, I like his young vibe (helped by Chelsie's good choreography) and he has great musicality.
    Judges' Take: Bruno and Carrie Ann really loved him - Carrie Ann liked his flavor and Bruno liked the way he stayed on the beat. However, Old Man Len thought it was all just too much.
    Score: A pair of 8s from Carrie Ann & Bruno, and a 7 from Len, for a total of 23.
  • Sherri Shepherd & Val Chmerkovskiy - Foxtrot
    Kel's Take: Rehearsal...I'm sorry Val, you are adorable, but you are not better looking than Maks. I think Sherri is going to eat Val alive. I feel like she was put with the wrong Chemerkovsky brother. Dance...Val's choreography really showed her off well. And damn, you can tell that she worked really really hard on her dancing. And holy crap does she look so happy to be dancing. I tell you what, being happy will get you far on this show. Val looks so proud of his girl!
    Jen's Take: I love her personality and joy above everything else! Sherri is super happy to be out there (and super happy to be dancing with Val because, well, who wouldn't?). Her dancing is good, but not great - she was a little stiff - but her bubbly personality won me over!
    Judges' Take: Even though they noted some problems, all three judges loved her joy and Len praised her for being "Fun fun fun!"
    Score: 8s from Carrie Ann and Bruno, with a 7 from Len, for a total of 23.
  • Melissa Gilbert & Maksim Chmerkovskiy - Chacha 
  • Kel's Take: Rehearsal...Slightly longer hair and facial hair on Maks is super hot. She seems to be really embracing Maks, which means that she could go far. Dance...She has a fringe catsuit! What up! She is also the only women who has had appropriate heel height. Ok, so I kept getting distracted by Maks' open shirt and abs and chest and what was I talking about again? Her arms were not great. But Maks looks great!
    Jen's Take: Melissa who? Maks looked fantastic with his open shirt! Seriously, though, y'all, Melissa lost her feet several places, and that drained the energy that she had at the beginning of the dance. Overall, she was sort of "meh," but I think we can chalk that up to a mix of nerves and being next to Maks with an open shirt.
    Judges' Take: The judges saw both potential and ambition, but they thought she looked nervous and needed more hip action.
    Score: 7s from the Sparkle Twins and a 6 from Old Man Len, for a total of 20.
  • William Levy & Cheryl Burke - Chacha 
  • Kel's Take: Rehearsal...I mean, he's hot and all, but I have no clue who the hell he is. Cheryl is definitely my favorite female pro! I hate when boys whine about their latin shoes. Because I've danced in men's latin shoes and they are amazingly comfortable! Hot boy is really whiny. Dance...This song does not sound great with the live singers. He has some good hip movement, but mostly he seems to be just standing there. Really ballroom, he wasn't that great. I know he's hot or whatever, but take it down a notch. He's not even the hottest guy on the show. Especially when you include pros.
    Jen's Take: I'm pretty sure the band was killing a cat during that song. Not nice, band! They're resting on William's sex appeal - he's good at the hip action - but he really doesn't dance well at all. He was mostly just walking, and he was behind the beat to boot. However, he does have moves and, therefore, potential.
    Judges' Take: Bruno praised his open shirt, while Carrie Ann praised the way he moved. Even Len liked that he "got into the spirit" and "kept control." What were they watching?
    Score: Three 8s, for a total of 24.
  • Martina Navratilova & Tony Dovolani - Foxtrot 
  • Kel's Take: Rehearsal...OMG I love her! Tony totally is the badboy of ballroom. Own it, Tony! Martina and her heels...I knew that was going to be a problem. Dance...She is super duper stiff. It is OK, Martina, you can relax a bit! That was awkward and she looked uncomfortable. But I still liked it. Mostly because I like her and I love Tony.
    Jen's Take: Martina is adorable, but she was so incredibly nervous! She definitely was stiff, but the stiffness worked somewhat because she translated it into elegance. It wasn't the best dance I've seen, but I really kind of like her!
    Judges' Take: They thought she was close, but not quite as good as she could be. However, they praised her more elegant, feminine side.
    Score: A pair of 7s (Sparkles) and a 6 (Old Man), for a total of 20.
  • Katherine Jenkins & Mark Ballas - FoxtrotKel's Take: Rehearsal...She is all sorts of adorable. I hope she has high energy because Mark definitely does. Dance...Her smile looks fake and she looks slightly terrified. She has really nice quality to her movements. I couldn't see much of her feet due to her dress, but she probably has the most natural ballroom talent so far this season.
    Jen's Take: I really like her poise. She's not super excitin, but she has a nice sense of rhythm. I didn't get too much of a terrified vibe off her. She wasn't natural, but she did seem very happy and sunny. She's definitely one to watch!
    Judges' Take: The judges loved her style and quality of movement, and only had quibbles, like that she needs to lift her ribcage more.
    Score: Two 9s, from Carrie Ann and Bruno, and an 8 from Len, for a total of 26.
  • Gladys Knight & Tristan MacManus - Chacha 
  • Kel's Take: Rehearsal...She introduced herself as a legend! Because she is a fucking legend. Tristan...oh my Irish hottie! I love her so much! Dance...Tristan has Red spats! I am in love. Also...Gladys fucking Knight is above judging. Don't even. She was amazing. I don't care if her technique wasn't great. Everyone else can suck it. I love her. Also, I really like Tristan's flair to his dancing. I hope her level of fame keeps her around for a long time because she loves it so much.
    Jen's Take: YOU GO GIRL! Gladys has an easy movement to her, and she really just seems to enjoy being on the dance floor and performing. She isn't the flashiest or the one with the best technique, but you can't go wrong with this living legend!
    Judges' Take: They loved her! Carrie Ann wanted to get up and dance, and Len praised the fact that she "oozes rhythm."
    Scores: 8s from the Sparkle Twins and a 7 from Len, for 23 total points.
  • Jaleel White & Kym Johnson - Foxtrot 
  • Kel's Take: Rehearsal...I love Jaleel so much. He is much hot! And I love Kym. Dance...I literally just sat and smiled during that entire dance. His shoulders may have been a touch high, but besides that...butter. Also, I totally called his skill in my introduction blog about it. He did not disappoint! Part of my love may be due to his vest...I love a guy in a vest!
    Jen's Take: A classic, great foxtrot, and SO smooth. Jaleel moves very, very well and I can see him going very, very far in the competition. I can't even accurately describe how great he was ... he was just wonderful! He's definitely one to watch.
    Judges' Take: Elegant and fantastic, and a perfect end to "the best first show of any season," according to Len.
    Scores: 9s from the Sparkle Twins and an 8 from Len, for 26 points.
So ... nobody goes home this week. Everyone gets another week to impress us and garner points and votes before they send someone home. However, snap judgment-wise ...

Favorites: Sherri Shepherd, Gladys Knight and Jaleel White
Least Favorites:  Let's get rid of Not Robert Wagner and go from there, shall we? If nothing else, it sucks that he's not Robert Wagner!

No comments:

Post a Comment