Oh, I'm just being sarcastic. I love our weekly foray into the world of sparkly insanity on the dance floor. And this week, it's Hollywood night, where movie stars are honored (since none of the titular stars are "movie stars," strictly speaking). Let's get down to business!
- Leah Remini & Tony Dovolani danced a rhumba to "Skyfall," which Adele sang for the latest James Bond film of the same name. I felt like the choreography really worked against them, because so much of it was the ever-popular "stop & pose" choreography, where the dancing doesn't flow like it should. It especially worked against Leah because when she actually kept moving, she was really quite sensual. She is kind of a goofy woman, but when she vamps it up, she's incredibly sexy. I loved those sexy moments, too, because they really had a lot of chemistry. The judges agreed that there was a lot of sex appeal to the dance, although they wanted some more fluidity through her arms. Carrie Ann, however, did like her arms, and thought she did a great job. Scores: Carrie Ann: 8; Len: 8; Bruno: 8. Total: 24.
- Corbin Bleu & Karina Smirnoff danced a quickstep with a story about a director in old Hollywood who loves the young starlet in his movie. Corbin seemed a little bit stiff, especially at the beginning, which is not a surprise because Karina REALLY pushed him this week with incredibly difficult choreography. I think he may have missed some of his steps, but he was very light on his feet and put a lot of personality into his dance. It wasn't as absolutely technically perfect as his first two dances, but the fantastic feel and his overall really great dance pushed any little mistakes to the back of my mind. Bruno and Carrie Ann loved the dance, but Len thought it was a little too hectic and that he lost some of the dance, even though he declared it "fabulous." Scores: Carrie Ann: 9; Len: 8; Bruno: 9. Total: 26.
- Elizabeth Berkley & Val Chmerkovskiy were next with a foxtrot to "Come Fly With Me." I loved the feel - very 1940s-1950s Hollywood glam. The dance was super cute, although I think Elizabeth was a little bit behind a few times. You could tell she was really getting into the dance, though, and I was pleased to see that her connection with Val was much, much better this week than last week. Val blindfolded her during the week to teach her to trust him and follow his lead, and it really helped with their connection. The judges really enjoyed the feel, although Carrie Ann pointed out a boo-boo in the middle of the dance. Len called it "chicken soup for the eyes." Scores: Carrie Ann: 8; Len: 9; Bruno: 8. Total: 25.
- Brant Daugherty & Peta Murgatroyd danced a quickstep to a 1920s-esque arrangement of "Crazy In Love." First of all, Brant had a bad week - he sprained a ligament in his foot, lost his phone and got robbed at gunpoint - so the drama was definitely ramped up in the training montage before the dance. However, the drama was for naught, because he danced really very well, especially for a quickstep in the first week. They definitely didn't have as many steps as Corbin, and he wasn't as crisp or fast on his steps, but it was a very cute dance and Brant showed way more personality than he did in the first two weeks. Overall, I liked it way more than I expected to like it. The judges were suitably impressed with his dance, although he dropped his shoulder sometimes. Scores: Carrie Ann: 9; Len: 9; Bruno: 9. Total: 27.
- Valerie Harper & Tristan MacManus were up next with a cha-cha, which featured them as Grace Kelley and Freddie Mercury dancing together to Mika's "Grace Kelley." Their dance was kind of a mess - Valerie was a bit stiff, and she couldn't remember all of her steps - but who cares, because it was an absolutely adorable concept and a super fun dance. Valerie gamely went up there and acted her heart out, despite forgetting a good chunk of her steps, and that's why she will continue in this competition no matter what happens. The judges liked the look and her confidence, but, of course, dinged her for all of her mistakes in her dancing. Scores: Carrie Ann: 6; Len: 5; Bruno: 5. Total: 16.
- Bill Engvall & Emma Slater danced next, with a paso doble to the Lone Ranger theme. They had to learn the dance on the road, because Bill had shows in Kentucky and Mississippi. Bill was working hard, though, because he really wants to win the competition now. I have to say, his hard work really paid off. He was still a little goofy and stiff, but his steps were mostly there, and he really brought a lot of passion and character to his dance, and it was a whole lot of fun to watch. (It was also fun to watch just how proud and happy he was after he danced, and he knew he danced well.) His arms are still a little wonky, but it was a great, snappy dance. The judges were very impressed by how he nailed the paso, and how he came out with guns a'blazin'! Scores: Carrie Ann: 8; Len: 8; Bruno: 8. Total: 24.
- Amber Riley & Derek Hough were up next with a Charleston to "Bang Bang" from "The Great Gatsby." Amber had a crazy busy week, with filming and recording in addition to her dance, but she did a great job. She really puts her entire body and face into her dances, and she really has a great style. Their dance was great, too, because it incorporated some hip-hop into it and made it super modern and fun. I could tell that they had a blast, and I was very impressed by just how great they danced together. Even Len liked it, and I wondered if he would since it had so much hip-hop stuff. The judges, however, did tell her to watch her sizzles and swivels and to work harder on getting more energy and snap into her bottom half. Scores: Carrie Ann: 8; Len: 8; Bruno: 8. Total: 24.
- Jack Osbourne & Cheryl Burke danced a 1970s-themed cha-cha to "Hollywood Swinging." Jack kind of looked like a dork, because he was a little bit stiff and he definitely did not look super sexy. He doesn't move his hips enough to really do the sexy thing that they were trying to go to for the dance. However, Jack was absolutely, positively adorable in the way that he tried SO DARN HARD. He really got into the dance and he worked really hard at it, and it was a lot of fun to watch. The judges didn't like his lack of hip action and the way he leans his weight back instead of keeping it over the balls of his feet, but Len was pleased with his commitment. Scores: Carrie Ann: 7; Len: 7; Bruno: 8. Total: 22.
- Christina Milian & Mark Ballas danced a Charleston to "Let Me Drown." Their dance was just downright fantastic. They really got into that 1920s feel, and Christina just really knew how to move. Their movements were very together and they connected incredibly well. I was incredibly entertained and just downright charmed by their dance. Christina really got into the dance, and she does a wonderful job acting out her character. The judges absolutely loved it, but Len, once again, wanted more swiveling action, even though he liked the dance as a performance. Scores: Carrie Ann: 9; Len: 8; Bruno: 9. Total: 26.
- Snooki & Sasha Farber were up next with a quickstep to "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend." Snooki didn't always seem quite like she knew what she was doing, but she really dove in and did a good job letting Sasha put her through her paces. She looked a little lost overall, though. I never quite felt like she grasped onto the dance and made it her own - she was letting Sasha do a lot of the work. However, she did glow at the end after doing a nice one-handed cartwheel with Sasha. It wasn't a bad dance, but I just didn't feel like a truly great dance to me. Len was surprised by how well she did on her first real ballroom dance, and Bruno and Carrie Ann were incredibly impressed. Scores: Carrie Ann: 9; Len: 8; Bruno: 8. Total: 25.
- Bill Nye the Science Guy and Tyne Stecklein danced a jazz dance to "Up All Night to Get Lucky." Bill had a big tear in his quad, and the doctor wanted him to not dance at all this week. However, Bill opted to immobilize his leg and have some crazy choreography that exploited his injury. He was a robot, and while he couldn't do a lot of dancing with his legs, he actually did a wonderful job moving his upper half and shuffling around as best he could. I have to give him all the credit in the world for going out there and dancing as best he could, and putting a lot of his wonderful, quirky personality in his dance. How could you not love it? The judges were suitably entertained and impressed with his spirit, determination and bravery, as well as impressed with Tyne's great choreography. Scores: Carrie Ann: 6; Len: 5; Bruno: 5. Total: 16.
After the dancing was done, it was time for the celebrities to find out their fate in the competition. Christina Milian, Brant Daughtery and Bill Nye were the three up for elimination, but Brant and Peta were soon declared safe. It was down between Christina Milian and Bill Nye, and, sadly, the love for Bill Nye couldn't carry him through to the next week. It's probably for the best, so that Bill could recover his knee, and he really wasn't much of a dancer, but I can't pretend that I'm anything but heartbroken over his elimination. He's really been eliminated too soon.
So, who should go home next week? The last two weeks, I've been saying that it should be Brant, because he's been boring, but he was actually a pretty fantastic, entertaining dancer tonight, so now I'm torn. Obviously, Valerie was the worst dancer, but she definitely should not go home next week because she's awesome. Also, anybody who dances to a Mika song should get an automatic pass to the next round of competition. I would probably say I was the least impressed with Leah, Jack and Snooki, but I don't particularly want to see anybody go home. I'm thinking it just might be one of them, though.
What did you think of "Dancing With the Stars" this week? How did you feel about this week's elimination?
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